Be honest... Brutally so...

Alright... I need help if I am ever going to be successful writer. With this as post number one, I will be randomly posting pieces of my work. Please critique me. I need to perfect my writing so we will start with passed work and slowly bring in the new stuff... deep breath... sigh. Here goes:

Young Women of Royalty By Amber Allen 11/2005

As young women in the world today we are judged by all we see,
We tend to listen when the TV tells us what we need to be.
The ideal lady is five foot six with long and flowing hair,
Rosy cheeks and sun tanned skin; when she walks by all should stare.
Her clothes are all the latest trends; make ups’ neatly applied
She is the best at all she does, mistakes are all denied.
Ever flawless proportioned body flaunts the clothes she wears.
“I’M PERFECT! YOU SHOULD BE LIKE ME!” says the sign she proudly bears.

Now tell me girls do any of you match the image just conveyed?
Of course not but still you try to match the portrait I’ve portrayed.
I have a secret to share with you—the world is one huge liar.
The beauty a young lady has comes from an unseen blazing fire.

Confidence and strength, with brains and morals true.
Standards held and loyalty kept, should be more important to you.
Inner beauty outshines all the outer can acquire.
Having goals and dreams accomplished set you, on the beauty ladder, higher.

Young women you are beautiful no matter what the world may say.
Stay strong and true to who you are, from temptation stay away.
Focus more upon the inside and guaranteed the out will shine.
For the beauty you will bear will be given from Divine.